A LEARNING EXPERIENCE "Life is divided into three terms - that which was, which is, and which will be. Let us learn from the past to profit by the present, and from the present to live better for the future." --------Wordsworth. "We understand death for the first time when he puts his hand upon one whom we love." -------Mad. De Stael Is there anything quite as hurtful as loss? We are seldom so sensitive, so uncertain, so despairing, so stressed, as when we are deprived and dispossessed. Re-adjustment to personal loss is perhaps the toughest test of life's stresses. Loss leaves mind, body and soul feeling distinctly bankrupt. Learning to adjust to personal loss can be an excruciating painful process which I have experienced first hand and after going through the entire cycle of emotions that finally brought me out of the grief process, I found myself to my amazement, a better more mature person than I was before I lost the one person I had hoped would always live by my side. I felt powerless, was disoriented, and experienced an inner sick feeling of personal distress. To have someone snatched, taken away, seized, left me empty and torn wishing perhaps that I had never been born. The world did not stop rotating; I wanted it to stop, but the world wandered on. Within me, one thousand voices cried, 'Why!' 'Why!' When the pain had subsided the impulse to live, to continue, to receive and to give beckoned strong and instinctively the light of hope outlived the long dark night. I emerged renewed, triumphant and strong, with the thought; things will be different, not as before but life will present new opportunities, an another new door would open. Bereavement, re-adjustment to loss, was a delicate journey of growth for me. Re-adjustment, coping with my loss began with acceptance. I accepted that I needed time and space, and balanced this with actions, tasks and goals that gradually helped me to recover and to accept that the future was indeed well worth living for and there was hope for a brighter future. I realized that when there is hope, courage and determination, there was a way to win over all odds. That life was an adventure, a bitter sweet affair, having ups and downs, happy times and sad times, smiles and frowns, sorrow and pain. Just as there is sun and the moon, daylight and darkness, life and death, I learnt to appreciate that life is an all or nothing deal. Truly, it is the hurts of life that gives the meaning to the happiness of life.